This is part of my new routine. They are about 15 minutes each. You sweat. It’s a lovely way to start every day. Sometimes I run too. Sometimes I meditate on all the ways it is so darn hard to take care of myself. I’m not a self disciplined person by nature…I’m a consummate Daisy sniffer, easily distracted by something shiny. In fact, I’m writing this blog on my way out the door for a run. I will hold out as long as I can because I know it’s going to be hard. Then I get home and wonder how I have not taken over the world yet. Exercise is a game changer. If I could give everybody one thing, it is the belief that you can do it too. Even if you’re a Daisy sniffer…
There is a misconception that if you are honest, if you share who you really are – people might not like you. The misconception is that you should care…honesty is the best way to find the people who will love you and weed out the people who will require you to lie about yourself in order for them to pretend to love you.
Be who you are. It attracts the kind of people who will really love you.
I have always had a thing for Annie. She buoyed me through my early college days when I was tentative and unsure of myself. She seems to be a mouthpiece for my strength and determination as I get older, indeed as she gets older. If I can rock 60 like this lady, I will very much look forward to the journey. If you haven’t seen her kick it with Hozier at the Grammys, do it right now…
Hozier, Annie Lennox – Take Me to Church / I Put a Spell on You (Medley)…: http://youtu.be/HZEChv1AaOk
I know I have the capacity to heal you. I can see where all the holes are. You leak regret and discomfort from wounds that won’t heal. I’ve watched you tear them open just to see if they still exist, if they ever did, just to make sure you’re not crazy. You wonder why, on a day steeped in carefree indulgence, do you feel so uneasy, so broken all over again. But love is a landmine that is triggered by itself…even new love reminisces about the old. The one that both expanded your heart and tore it apart. The new love wreaks of putrid reminders even as your head is full of her perfume, your hands full of her body.
I know I could heal you. Slowly. Just like you need it. Sweet transitions with sweet nothings echoing in the hallway of her museum. You simply want to leave her behind. You offer your sins for redemption.
But I am always left wondering, who will save you from me?
We are just sleeping together.
This is just until the next best thing comes along.
I love the feel of your skin.
But it’s the loudest thing I have ever heard.
It makes me feel.
I’m not ready for a relationship.
That’s funny, he says, I was just thinking this is the best one I’ve ever been in. This non-relationship stuff is cool.
Which puts us in a relationship.
It might as well be a cage, for me.
Of course, now I have to leave.
Always the end.